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March, 2001

“THAT THE GENERATION TO COME MIGHT KNOW THEM”
By Marilyn Conrad, President

A recent news report stated that Oklahoma’s divorce rate was second only to Nevada’s. The reporter suggested that this was due to the individualistic spirit of the residents of the Sooner state. He also suggested that, since Oklahoma is in the Bible Belt, pressure is put on young people to marry, producing impossible situations and marriages destined for the divorce courts.

It is ironic that in an area of the country where the Word of God is taught and revered, instead of strong and stable marriages, divorce is all too common.

Our society is more and more hostile to marriage and family and continues to accept as the norm such replacements for the traditional family as single parents, blended families and homosexual relationships. All the more reason for us to continue to hold up God’s standard for marriage and family. Needless to say, it is important for us to keep on praying for pastors to come into understanding about and to receive God’s heart for marriage. At Covenant Keepers, we are committed to the concept of life-long marriage. God created marriage to be a one-flesh relationship, “until death do us part.”

When confronted with Moses’ bill of divorcement (Mark 10:2-12) Jesus spoke to the issue of human nature, to the hardness of men’s hearts. We are not to separate what God has joined together. Therefore, marriage for Christ’s followers, then and today, is still the same, one man for one woman: one flesh. The union is meant to be permanent. As born again believers, we are not to have hard hearts. We have the ability to forgive and we are responsible to be a channel for forgiveness to flow into the Body of Christ, especially with our mates (Ephesians 4:32).

Generations are at stake in our countries. Everyone loses when a marriage is ended, except for the lawyers. Perhaps the most wounded and devastated are the children.

Interestingly, in Mark 10, immediately after Jesus spoke with the disciples about divorce, people brought young children to Him. When His disciples rebuked them, Jesus said, “Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not…” and He took them in His arms and blessed them. Perhaps Jesus knew what divorce would do, especially to the children.

WE GET LETTERS

FROM A CANADIAN COVENANT KEEPER

I felt I must write to tell you how much Covenant Keepers has meant to me. Since our marital separation I have known that I was deeply committed to restoration but had questions within myself (and from others) as to whether this desire for reconciliation was just some “sickness” in me that didn’t “let me go” or just what it was.

Being a psychologist, I had all the head knowledge anyone would need about the dynamics of these relationships. When I received your information, my feet went on a Rock and I knew the Truth.

Since then I have immeasurable joy and peace in believing God’s Word and heart for the covenant of marriage. As a result of the studies, I have rest in letting God do what He will do, and I am able to trust Him and so feel relief of my burden.

In years past, I frequently spoke about marriage at different meetings. The Lord showed me at that time the significance of the one-flesh relationship in marriage. I understood it as two parts of a circle.

Adam was made for fellowship with God, and out of his need, Eve was given. But God’s desire was for fellowship with the whole “Adam,” so Eve and he were immediately put back into a one-flesh relationship to maintain complete communion with God.

Then sin entered and broke the relationship. It came back together as a circle but without a perfect “fit.” Only God’s action could engineer that perfect fit. This is true for any marriage, but in the case of marital breakdown, it is even more pronounced.

In order for the two halves to come back together, one half (of necessity) has to remain still. (Imagine trying to glue a broken handle onto a teacup that someone keeps randomly moving around!) This is what the ministry of Covenant Keepers does.

A Son's Perspective
By Steven Elliott

Do you believe in absolutes? Is the Bible the unchanging Word of the living God? These questions are becoming more important to our society as we continue to slip into the darkness of moral pluralism. We have become a people who do not believe in a complete right or a complete wrong. We are content to leave what could practically be called Truth up to individual interpretation in order to avoid being offensive. The absence of absolutes can perhaps be seen most clearly in the modern family unit which, being the basis for a Christian society, has become the enemy's number one target.

My family has been no exception to this moral onslaught. I have lived in a single-parent home all of my life, never experiencing or possessing the love of my father. Divorce tore my family to shreds leaving nothing but emptiness, brokenness and confusion. Our home was on the way to becoming another statistic, just one more fatality in the war for the family. But thankfully, God offered far more than broken pieces. He offered hope and a future in Him. The choice for God and the restoration of the home was made by my Mom many years ago and has made all the difference since.

I still don't know what an earthly father's love is like nor may I ever. But through the commitment made by my Mom to our family and to obedience to God, I have seen what is truly eternal in this life. I have seen that being true to God will always bring the most fulfillment and joy of any other alternative. My Mom has lived without a husband and I without a father but we have experienced the sustaining power of God. The road has not always been easy but it has developed a love and dependence upon God that would have lain dormant in easier circumstances. That relationship with God modeled continuously and tried constantly is something I would not trade for the love of anyone. It is all that matters.

Anything worth having is worth sacrificing for. The question then, in upholding a higher standard of truth through the stand for restoration of families, is what is worth having? What will last? Temporal, emotional fulfillment or the reward of a faithful servant? What do you want? Is your family worth it?

In writing these words and posing these questions I seek not to condemn, nor do I want it to be thought that upholding any standard is an easy thing in which you don't experience failure. Jesus promises that we will encounter heartache and tribulation in this world, but He has overcome the world and we can share in His victory. Take heart, the road is not an easy one but the reward of the faithful in this life is great. Allow God to sustain you and guide you in all that you do and His plans will be accomplished. God is in control.

(Steven is the son of Cindy Elliott, North Central Regional Director)

A note from Cindy: Each one of us as Covenant Keepers is walking through different seasons of our stand. I would encourage you to ask God to give you His eternal picture of keeping your covenant. This is not just about you and your spouse. It is about your children, future generations to come, and most importantly, the image of God.

Prodigals will return to the Son in 2001!