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THE
MOST DIFFICULT DECISION
Following
is a portion of a letter a covenant keeper wrote to her pastor about
remaining faithful to her covenant a few years ago. We believe the
letter reflects godly motives and a right attitude.
Dear Pastor,
As you know, I have
been struggling with making a decision about divorce. I am grateful
for your encouragement to search God's Word for a better
understanding. It was also clear to me after meeting with you that I
was on my own before God while making my decision with good
conscience.
After events
escalated and I experienced much despair, I filed for divorce about a
year ago. I have never been comfortable with that action, and my
doubts became too strong to ignore. The climax of my doubt struck me
last New Year’s Eve while I was listening to Christian radio in my
car.
A woman gave her
testimony about not giving up. I could no longer deny what I knew in
my heart to be true. Against God’s will I had given up on my
marriage.
According to some, 1
Corinthians 7:15 permits me to divorce my husband. One of my favorite
Bible stories is about Hosea and Gomer. One could not get a more
despicable spouse than Gomer! Gomer’s transgressions against God and
her husband were utterly horrible and drawn out. But Hosea remained
faithful to God and his wife throughout her rebellion. He finally won
her heart after buying her out of slavery.
God used Hosea’s
faithfulness and forgiveness as an example to the entire nation of
Israel. Hosea 14:4 says, “I will heal their backsliding, I will love
them freely, for my anger is turned away from them.”
Because I do not
desire to hinder the gospel of Christ, I have chosen not to divorce. I
found my ministry to women and others to be shamefully hindered by
being a Christian divorcee. Furthermore, Moses, not God, permitted
divorce (under the circumstances of adultery) because of the hardness
of hearts (Matthew 19:8). My heart is anything but hardened against my
husband. I love him and have come to understand him more each
day.
If I decided to
divorce my husband at this point, my main motivation would be to have
the freedom to remarry. However, God makes it perfectly clear that His
will for me would be for me to remain unmarried (1 Corinthians 7:27).
I am fully convinced
that it is God’s will for me to remain bound to my husband even
within my present condition of separation (1 Corinthians 7:10-11). I
have found my situation to be a unique challenge of remaining faithful
to my husband and a special opportunity to please God as an unmarried
woman by my lifestyle of caring for the things belonging to the Lord
(1 Corinthians 7:32-34).
It is difficult to
describe the utter joy and peace that has overcome me after making
this decision. The sacrifice and anguish of making the most difficult
decision I have ever been called to make pales in light of the
blessing I have found in being obedient to my God.
The loneliness and
heartache of living without my husband fades compared to my renewed
relationship to Jesus—serving Him at any cost.
A
COVENANT KEEPER
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