Marriage According To God’s Plan…
(In response to an article from a popular Christian magazine regarding the church’s role in divorce recovery).
I have been divorced for five years after a beautiful 43 year marriage. My husband is a spirit-filled, talented Christian musician who was allured and enticed away by the enemy. I agree that this is definitely one of the most painful situations a person can experience. The first six months after my divorce I spent every moment possible seeking the Lord and His plan for my life. The Lord is incredibly faithful. I knew that I knew that I was to stand for the reconciliation of my marriage which the Lord has confirmed many times with dreams, visions, rhema words and whatever else He chose to show me. I have never looked back.
That being said I’d like to respond with some eye-opening revelations I have seen that most of us would not see if we hadn’t gone through this life changing experience.
First of all, I do place appropriate responsibility on the church and church leaders who have not addressed covenant in marriage and the Biblical way to live out a divorce; and for not studying what the Bible says about the deeper meanings about divorce and remarriage. The reason the divorce rate is the same in the church as it is in the world is because the church treats it the same way the world does. What does it mean when we recite our vows and we quote that we will remain faithful for better or worse, sickness and health, richer or poorer, UNTIL DEATH PARTS US? The Bible says reconcile or remain unmarried. Yes, we will find mercy and grace if we did not follow the Biblical plan and if we truly repent of our sin but it won’t be God’s perfect will. Marriage is intended to be the picture of Christ’s covenant with us; His unconditional love and forgiveness. Even if we did not want a divorce, we, unfortunately, have to face the consequences of it. But through His grace and mercy, God will make good out of it if we are obedient to His Word.
I could have chosen to follow the “wide path” (Matthew 7:13-14) where there is plenty of room to move on to someone else. Or I could have followed the crowd that doesn’t believe or put their trust in a God that can and wants to do impossible healing and restoration so He can be glorified. Besides that – what about our spouses, the prodigals who have lost their way? Yes, and what about our families and future generations? We may be the only ones who will stand faithfully in the gap, interceding, contending against the enemy and what he is doing in the world to break down the very fiber of society – the family.
I have chosen to follow the “narrow path,” which is very narrow. Sometimes there is only enough room for Jesus as He carries me on that rugged road. I know what God’s Word says, what Jesus did on the cross and I will not waste one drop of that precious blood to give the enemy a victory that is not his to have. It is lonely and painful but I know according to Revelation 12:11 that we overcome by the blood of the lamb and the Word of our testimony and will not love our lives so much that we would not die for the cause of Christ.
During the first six months after my divorce a man did come into my life and, being love-starved as I was at the time, it was tempting. I had been fasting and praying. The Lord gave me a picture of two circles. One showed that I could choose to have a relationship but it would be fleshly, fun, flattering but fleeting. I would no longer have a testimony and my children would be affected for generations. The next circle showed a beautifully colored world where the presence of God was everywhere because I followed where God was leading me. I had no problem choosing the second circle. I have never been tempted since. The Lord also gave me this verse early in my stand – Submit to God, resist the devil and he will flee from you. James 4:7.
As I conclude, I will say that I am working on not judging or finding offense in anyone’s choices, for we will all stand corrected at the judgement seat. For myself, out of total surrender to the will of God, even if my husband never comes back, I will be obedient to what the Word of God has spoken to me.